Momma's Gotta Make Time for Play

Do you feel that you have enough play time in your life? I am not talking about Candy Land or Hungry Hippos!! I am talking about taking time out of almost everyday to do something you really enjoy, something that makes you smile--something to shift your mood, mindset or attitude, something that is fun and has nothing to do with work, errands or carpool. Does this make any sense to you? Maybe you love to paint, scrapbook or do yoga? Or maybe you are a dancing queen? I am talking about taking 10-20 minutes a day to do something that brings out your inner child. I recently read that allowing yourself the freedom to play and take a break in the midst of all of your obligations can really clear your mind, give you renewed energy and give you a fresh perspective on everything. I just love how simple it is! Take a 'mind vacation' in the middle of your busy day and shift everything by just checking out for a few moments.

If you really want proof that this works, just look at your young kids and how happy they are switching from one play activity to the next, constantly immersed in this cycle of recreation, and they become rejuvenated by one playful activity after another. Just think all it takes to recharge your batteries is skipping down the street instead of walking or coloring in your child's coloring book. This 'play' is different for everyone, but whatever it is, it should allow you to escape and think only of that activity for a brief period of time, so when you come back you are renewed and inspired. For me its cooking something new, browsing the beautiful seasonal produce at the local farmers market, hiking, and scrapbooking--I get completely lost in these activities and when I come out of it brings me to entirely new state of mind. What is your 'play'? What do you love to do that might help you get out of a rut now and again? What feeds your soul? I'd love to hear from you!


Wanna come out and play?
Romy, Goddess of the Playground

Ode to Dory

I want to start off by apologizing for this more somber blog entry, but I think there is a valuable lesson to be learned by sharing my experience. Yesterday, my son's pet fish (his first pet) Dory (yes he named her Dory from Nemo because she was blue) died and it was a sad and insightful day in our household. She had been with us for over two years and while my son did not interact and bond with her daily, he loved the idea of having a pet that he helped take care of and talk to now and again. She held a special place in his life, and he will never forget her. So as parents of a four year old, my husband and I wondered, do we tell him? Is it necessary to upset him? How will he react? Should we just buy another beta fish and replace her, he won't know the difference? But we decided the right choice for us was to tell him that she passed on and that we could do some special things to remember her and help us heal.

Well, my son is very compassionate and when we told him that Dory went to heaven he LOST it. He was balling on his Daddy's shoulder (with a face full of red velvet cupcake btw) and could barely talk about it, it was so sad to see him ache, yet so right. In that moment of his suffering, I thought we made the right decision to begin teaching him about life and appreciating what we have/who have right now. We had a flushing ceremomy where we each said something special about Dory and something we would miss, and then to help him cope further, my boys got a picture of a beta on the net and printed it out with a story that my son wrote to remember Dory (along with storytelling pictures he drew too) and how special she was to him--he displayed it with pride on our fridge. As a result of how we handled this experience, my son started to learn about grieving, how to express his feelings approriately and how important it is to pay attention to the gifts around you--and I think he really 'got it' and really absorbed as much as a four year old mind is capbable of. He was even in such 'mourning' that he didn't feel it was appropriate to go on a family walk last night 'because Dory is dead.'

So why am I sharing all this? I think on the surface I wanted to share a teaching moment that worked for me and might be helpful to others, but I also to share a more subtle insight about staying present with the people (or pets) in your life and appreciating them more fully. I continously go back to the familiar lifestyle of the modern multi-tasking mom whose cup runneth over and who is often caught up in all this clutter that she misses the beauty around her, she misses the people whose gifts and wisdom impact her life and sometimes she doesn't take a moment to appreciate until they are gone. In honor of Dory, why don't you take a moment to connect/reconnect with someone you haven't touched base with in a while and appreciate what they bring to your life before you miss this fleeting chance.


Until next time,
Romy
Goddess of the Sea and 'Seeing'

Moma's Got a 'Case of the Mondays'

OK, I know its Tuesday and I am just getting around to writing my weekly blog (which usually comes out on Monday BTW) hence the title of this blog suggesting that I've got a 'case of the Mondays!' Have you ever heard of this phrase? I just read it somewhere and just LOVED it because it very much captures and conceptualizes how I feel many days, but especially on Mondays when everything starts all over again, my plate is full, I've got a million things to do and feel overwhelmed before I even get started. How great is it that someone (I think its from the movie Office Space) acutally coined a phrase that captures how crappy I feel when I start the week--it ROCKS and just makes me feel better knowing that someone else 'gets it'. I have so much on my plate these days that I often have a hard time prioritzing all my to do's--getting my son ready for school, prepping meals, taking him to school, laundry, groceries, checking e-mail, blogging, marketing and reinventing my old business, and trying to launch my new business--and oh yeah exercise, staying healthy, socializing, connecting with family and friends and trying to look hip and put together-WHEW! I am exhausted just typing that.

So why do I bring this all up and what does it all mean? Well, I just think that today's modern, multi-tasking woman/mom is pulled in multiple directions and unfortunately many things in her life suffer because she is not able to pay enough attention to each individual aspect of her life. She doesn't have the time it takes to put herself together from head to toe, be abreast of all the latest news topics, feel like a sex goddess on a regular basis or really dedicate herself to launching a business or stimulating her children's minds. She just gives a sprinkle of herself to everything, but often not enough time to one thing. I certainly struggle with this and that is why I am writing this blog to normalize this predicament and why I am working on developing tools and resources to address this very issue of loosing your groove/soul. But it is a slow process and its only Tuesday, but next Monday is just around the corner.

Thanks for listening,
Romy, Goddess of Getting Past Monday :0)

Snips & Snails & Puppy Dog Tails

Do you remember going to camp as child? The excitement and simplicity of it all? I remember loving being out in nature, being with my friends, away from Mom and Dad and I truly have some of my fondest memories from my camp days. So this past weekend, we had the wonderful opportunity to go to a beautiful remote camp in Ojai as a family and we had the most magnificent time together. The accomodations were more like Motel 6 than the bunks I remember from my camp days, the food was surprisingly good and the environment was a slice of heaven.

My four year old boy was in all his glory having nature and his posse of friends at his disposal. They got to hang out all day, play and immerse themselves in the beauty of nature. And imagine my surprise, disgust and joy when his favorite task of the weekend became being a master snail collector (EWE!) He was fearless as he went searching through the bushes hunting for snails, and once he spotted his mark he would effortlessly pluck the unsuspecting snail from its place and then bring it to the collection area, probably collecting at least 15-20 snails in total. This ALL BOY endeavor was over seen by an enterprising smart alec older boy who crowned my son King Snail collector!

My first reation to this little adventure was "No don't touch/do that it is yucky and you can get germs" but my second and more thoughtful reaction was, "Hey wait a minute, 'snips & snails' this is exactly what little boys are supposed to do and who am I to interupt this natural right of passage?" The sweetness and beauty of this moment just tickles my soul, because my son was just being a boy and I consciously let him do just that rather than trying to impose my expectations or agenda on him. How many times do we as parents try to derail or redirect our kids to do something we want them to do, rather than letting them do what is natural to them? I will fondly remember this magical weekend as the one where my little boy entered his first right of passage (without my interuption :-), and the one where I took many moments to absorb the beauty all around me just like I did as a camper many moons ago.


Goodbye muddah, goodbye faddah,


Romy, Goddess Moma of the King of Snails